The Elephant in the Room


Can we talk about the elephant in the room here?

Maybe even just the elephant in the schoolroom?

I think we can all agree that already we are going into another year of craziness and uncertainty. I think it may be the top post I see on Facebook every single day, all about what kids are putting on their faces, what quarantine is happening, etc.

Things are changing daily.

If there is anything we can all agree on, it is that this isn’t exactly the year we thought our children would have.

One thing I know is that when we feel like we have lost control, we tend to grab for anything it is that we can control. We get a little frantic, we stress, we get anxious and we look for answers.

For the past few weeks, I have found myself on Facebook reading comments, watching the news, getting updates and I feel absolutely lost.

So, for one, if you feel this way, you are NOT alone.

But here is where I want to bring up this elephant in the room. This big annoying elephant that is making moms crazy, pushing moms against each other, and making us all wish we were in a time where life was much simpler.

We aren’t all ever going to agree on the same things.
We all aren’t going to be on the same page.
We all aren’t going to have the same beliefs, morals, etc.

But we all are DOING OUR BEST.

Imagine if you thought that before you got upset or before you thought someone was “wrong.” Try having this idea, this mindset, this new way of thinking.

Close your eyes, take a breath and say “Everyone is just doing their best.”

If you truly believed that every mom was just doing their best, their actual best they could at this very moment, you may give them more grace. You may realize that we are all going through hard things right now and we all are making big decisions and having a not-so-normal year together.

I know that I won’t always agree with each mom. But I do know that the very fact that each mom has an opinion or is sharing concern in any mom group or school group is because that mom is being a MOM. She is doing her job as a mother and she is doing what she believes is best. How can I ever be upset with that?

There are plenty of people that don’t have a mom to do that for them, so let’s give some love and props to the ones that are there.

To the moms feeling stressed,
You are not alone.

To the moms feeling lost,
You are not alone.

To the moms feeling like you need a glass of wine and a hug,
You are not alone.

To the moms who sometimes doubt themselves,
You are doing your best.

And that is enough.

To every mom, everywhere, I challenge you to give yourself grace, give the mother next to you grace, give the teachers, the school boards, the mom groups, give them all grace.
And remind yourself, that every mom is simply DOING THEIR BEST.

And that is ok.

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Farin is a Maryland native. She moved to the Charleston area after visiting on a whim. She fell in love, told her husband she wanted to live where she was happiest, so here she is! She is a married mom of two. She plays lacrosse & soccer, loves being outside, and loves exploring new places. She is a CT Technologist here at MUSC, runs the Inspire Her Podcast, is the author of the Live Inspired Gratitude Journal and is also a health and fitness coach. As cliche as it sounds, she loves long walks on the beach, seeing the sunset with a frose' in hand, trying guacamole from every restaurant and mid day naps.