I Can See the Calm in You, My Son


 I can see the calm in you, my sonWe recently went to Folly Beach and I noticed something that I’ve never taken the time to stop and think about.

I saw moments when both of my boys were calm. Really, truly calm.

Not pretending to be calm, or even just being patient. But that calm that you find when you daydream. The calm you experience as you listen to the rain hitting the rooftop. 

True calm.

I’ve seen these moments before, of course . . .

The moments when they stare off into space, with their minds free of all of the stress and concern a child can feel. Or when I see them practicing mindfulness exercises that they’ve learned at school (this one really gets me — my soul just smiles). And there are times when they read together, flipping the pages and laughing with each other — no worries in sight.

And I recognized that this calmness that my boys were feeling was not something new, but something I’ve never taken the time to appreciate until now.

With summer here, I’m preparing myself for the chaos that it will bring. The true chaos: yelling, throwing, and showing all the anger they have. (We all get a little cooped up and tired of each other over the summer, right?)

I remind myself that our children are growing up in a world where emotions are okay. Talking about how we feel is a part of life now, and I’m so thankful for that. Not being afraid to express when they are angry, sad, or happy . . . this is a good thing.

And as a mom, I try to help them manage these feelings and come back to their calm. But honestly, they already know how to do this themselves. And just reminding them is sometimes all they need.

And their calmness will remind me that I can be calm, myself.

I can take these small moments of clarity and stillness, and add them up through my week and come out with a few hours of calmness. That is a win in my book.

As we flow through this summer, I’m going to be mindful of these moments of calm. I’m going to really soak them up and know that even when the chaos comes, so will the calm.